Not our best day ever...

I have often heard it said that Christmas Eve is a terrible day to travel. Despite these reports, travel is what Ashley and I did this year...and it was not our best day ever. Here is a timeline of events leading up to our arrival in Redlands, CA:

4:30am: They day began with the wonderful buzz of an alarm clock, and would continue for nearly 21 hours.

5:15am: The adventure began as we left the house, closed the door, and instantly realized that we had just locked ourselves out of the house. Not that big of a deal as we have a friend staying with us who has a key (the problem being that this friend was back in CA with our key). Luckily, it was not until much later that we realized we had forgotten things. Oh well...none of the forgotten stuff was super important.

5:40am: We arrived at the Del Rio airport. Now for those of you who know nothing of Del Rio, it's airport is very much representative of the city. Though an international airport in name, do not be fooled. The airport consists of a small sitting room, a single check in desk for the only airline to fly out of Del Rio (Continental), one metal detector and tiny waiting room on the far side of "security," and a small snack room consisting of a coffee pot and a vending machine. The airport has two flights a day, and caters primarily to Laughlin personel trying to flee the town on what many call the "Freedom Bird." Moving on. Arriving at the airport we were greeted by several friends who were on the same flight, and quickly found out that the flight was delayed for 2 hours due to thunderstorms in Houston (all flights in and out of Del Rio go through Houston). We knew at that moment that it was about to be one of those days. This meant we would be missing our connection, and our entire travel plan was about to be null and void. Checking in, we were re-booked on a flight that would get us into LA only 3ish hours later than planned. Not to bad...or so we thought.

7:30am: We were informed that the flight was now being delayed due to mechanical problems, and that the estimated departure time was now 9:30. So up to the counter we went, to be re-booked again. This time, doing so was not so simple. Being that it was Christmas eve, flights were booked completely full. After about 20 minutes, the agent was able to finally re-book us on a flight that would get us into LAX at 8:04pm, meaning a 6 hour layover in Houston. As I stood there hearing this, I realized that this was going to be one heck of a day. But at least we were getting a free up-grade to First Class. Could be worse I guess.

I should pause here and tell you what our initial travel plan was so that you can understand why the next few hours were just down right stressful. The original plan was as follows: depart Del Rio at 0620, have an hour layover in Houston, followed by a flight to LAX; from there we would take a shuttle to John Wayne Airport and be picked up by my sister; my sister would then take us to Biola to pick up the truck we would be using for the duration of our time in LA. All in all a bit of a hassle, but it would get the job done. Unfortunately our delay through all of this off.

11:00am: We finally made it to Houston. Hurray. After grabbing a quick bite to eat, we headed for the USO (military lounge). From there we began to brainstorm how in the world we would get to Redlands from LAX. As noted above, the original plan relied on my sister being available to drive us to get our car. Unfortunately, my sister had plans with the in-laws for the evening, causing us to rethink our plan. After some brainstorming, we decided we could cancel our original shuttle, rent a car, go pick up our borrowed car, and return our rental...no harm done. So that's what we planned to do. Calling up the shuttle company, I found out I had made a major mistake...I had booked our shuttle for the wrong day, and they would not refund the money. Deciding I would call and deal with them later, I began calling rental companies, and after two hours on the phone with every rental car company at LAX we realized that this new plan was not going to work. Why not? There wasn't a single rental car to be had on Christmas eve. So now, plan C. Call up the shuttle company, and try to fight to have our shuttle changed to Christmas Eve night, and not have to pay again for a shuttle we didn't take. Spending about 30 minutes on hold, I finally was able to speak to a real person at Prime Time Shuttle. Speaking in a very rude tone, the customer service rep told me in no nice way that I was out of luck. I then asked to speak to a manager, and the person on the line made it clear I was bothering her, and told me to just go to the rep at the shuttle stop when I got to the airport and they would be able to change my ticket. Not really buying what she was selling, I called back 15 minutes later and after another 20 minutes on hold, was connected to another manager. This guy told me strait up (though in a much more civil and respectful tone) that there was nothing that could be done. By the end of this ordeal, Prime Time Shuttle lost my business forever. All this is to say, we ate the $40, and rebooked with another shuttle company.

8:05pm: We finally arrived in LA. We got our bag, hailed the shuttle and got a ride to Biola to pick up our truck.

9:30pm: Arriving at Biola, we grabbed our truck and headed for Redlands.

12:00am: After sitting in traffic for an hour of our 2.5 hour drive, we arrived in Redlands. Strait to bed for us.

So what's the lesson of all of this? Sometimes traveling sucks.

Best Friend Visit

So, my lovely best friend made the trek out to Del Rio to visit us last weekend! I picked her up in San Antonio (a good excuse to get some shopping done in The Big City) and we spent the whole weekend just hanging out. She got the official tour of Del Rio, which means driving up and down the main boulevard, getting some Mexican food, and tasting wines at the Val Verde Winery. I loved having her experience what our life is like especially since she may be the only person to visit us in Del Rio before we move in February. Her visit coincided with the first night of Hanukkah, so of course we had to celebrate the occasion. Above is a picture of Zach manning the potato latkes.

As a special treat, she gave Zach and I a free photo session and edited the pictures the same day. Enjoy!

We know where we're going!!!

We've been given our next location and before we let the cat out of the bag we have a few hints for you....

1) We will DEFINITELY be buying winter jackets before we move.

2) The movie The Untouchables was filmed here.

3) It's the location of the first UFO sighting "caught on tape" in 1950.

We'll let you know soon!

~Ashley

It's Christmas Time

Step by step

Those of you who have read my blog in the last few days are probably wondering what has happened since deciding to walk away from this pilot thing. Well, it's not really that long of a story. A bunch of paperwork and meetings later, I am now in limbo. This is not a place I normally like to be, but for once I have complete peace that this is all going to work out. Everything began on Monday with a meeting with my two flight commanders (who I report directly to). They decided they wanted me to have one more day to think things through (which I didn't need, but also didn't have much say about). On Tuesday morning I met with them once more and began the paperwork in earnest. I was pleasently surprised that neither of my commanders, nor any of my flight mates gave me much of a hard time about it. Most were understanding, and some were even proud of me for making such a tough decision (which definitely caught me off guard).

Part of this paperwork was my career dream sheet. As I began working on this with Ashley, I was reminded of the time three years ago when I was doing exactly the same thing. At the time I was incredibly torn about what jobs to put down (we are allowed to put our top 5 choices). Even then I questioned whether this was the route I wanted to go, but after a lot of thoguht and prayer I figured that I needed to give it a shot. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and I sure didn't want to look back and wonder "what if." I've always been afraid of getting to my later years and saying those words. Well, as you know, I got my first choice. And now I am here again. Looking at the list, and wondering how it is all going to work out. Well after some thought, discussion, and prayer we settled on putting intelligence as our first choice, and space & missiles as our second.

Now, with my paperwork submitted and meetings finished, it is a waiting game. Depending on how things go, I should know my new job within two weeks (this is of course Air Force time, which, for any of you who talked to me during the 9 months leading up to starting flight school know, could actually mean 2-4 weeks). At this time, I will hopefully also know where I will be going (what base) and when, though this information could take several more weeks to get to me. All told, if things go the way they have gone for most, we should be on our way out in in roughtly two months. We shall see.

A world upside-down

Almost 11 months ago, I loaded everything I owned into my Nissan Xterra, and hit the road for Del Rio, TX. I had no idea what I would be getting myself into. I had no idea that I would be living in a little version of the town I grew up in (Bakerfield). I didn't know that in a couple months I would be engaged, or that I would meet my best AF friend the first day I showed up on base. I didn't know that I would drive close to 6,000 miles in the next four months, or that I would spend four of the hardest weeks of my life trying to learn how to fly in the AF context. I didn't know that I would get married. What I did know was that I was embarking on an adventure. And I was right. At the time I titled this blog "Adventures Make Great Stories," because I knew that many of these adventures would be challenging, and would, at the time, challenge me spiritually, physically, and emotionally as I had never experienced. But I also knew that those same adventures/challenges would leave me with stories I had never imagined. I was right.

Now, 11 months later, I consider calling it a day on one adventure, and embarking on another in which I have no idea what I am getting myself into. Many of you know that I have struggled long and hard with this whole being a pilot thing. I have more than once over the past 11 months questioned whether this is the "thing" for me. I questioned what I was doing here in TX, and desperately wanted to quit the screening program in CO (thank you to all who prayed for me during these times). When I completed the program in CO, I told myself that I would go ahead and give this flying thing here in Del Rio a shot. God had once again left the door open for me to walk through, and who am I to not walk through an open door? Well i have walked through that door, and now two months into the program, I am questioning whether this is where I am meant to be.

As my dad has pointed out to me many times before, God seeks to give us the desires of our hearts. Being an AF pilot has long been the desire of my heart. As long as I can remember, flying has been what I have wanted to do with my life. Being a pilot is what everyone sees me as, and it has been my goal. God has graciously allowed me to pursue this desire for years, but I am not so convinced it is God's end game for me. In fact, I am rather confident it is not.

This has been hard for me to grasp, and harder for me to consider it's implications. While talking about what the future would look like if I walked away from this opportunity, Ashley asked that I step back and really think about the things that I would be giving up were I to walk away. Agreeing to do so, I was forced to realize the gravity of such a decision. It is not that I had not thought about the many things I would be giving up before, but it was the first time I thought of them all at the same time. I though of walking into my commander's office and quitting, of turning in my g-suit and flight helmet. I thought of never walking out and strapping into another plane, of not pulling Gs, and of not standing outside in front of the planes a year from now in front of my family and friends having my wings pinned on. I thought of not waiting with anticipation to find out my aircraft and find out what type of mission I would be doing. I thought about not doing follow on training. I thought about getting to my base after here and seeing all the planes and realizing that I could have flown one of those. I thought of not having a guaranteed 10 year future in the AF, and the fact that in 4 years, I would have to face a lot of these same decisions again. I thought of the way my friends would react, and my family as well. I thought about all my pilot friends here who would ask me why in the world I would walk away, and how I would have to try to explain my decision. I thought about Ashley and how she would have to answer the same questions among the wives. I thought of leaving our home sooner rather than later, and having to start over from scratch after only a year. I thought about a lot of things, but I also thought of what the future would look like on the other side of the decision. On the other side was a future even brighter.

Let me paint the picture that I see. I see a future where I do not wake up each morning just praying to make it through the day, and nearly sick with stress because I so desperately don't want to fly that day. I see a future where I actually get to see my beautiful wife, and someday, our beautiful kids. I see a future where my kids don't forget who I am because I have been away from home for nearly 200 days that year flying around the world. I see a future where I get to use my gifts and lead people as an officer should. I see unique opportunities to serve my country (not that flying would not be a very unique opportunity...just different). I see peace that this debate that has raged within me for the last couple years finally be put to rest. I see a different type of graduation. I see getting to my next base and plugging into a new community, and getting to know a very different side of the air force. I see myself doing something I actually enjoy. I see myself leaving Del Rio with good memories, and with good times under my belt, but without regret. I see a future where I actually have the time and the energy to do the things I like to do. I see a life where my wife and I can get involved in our church together and serve together. I see opportunities to go where we really want to, and to do what we want to. If I am honest, I see much more light down this road than down the other.

(a day break in writing)

Well that is that. I will be posting more soon.

Mas aviones

I test out the scary bucket seats in the C17. Ride for hours in that? No thanks.
"I can fit my whole house in this plane!"
Zach checking out the cargo hold of a plane.
Zach in front of a C130. Little trivia fact: if you want to sound like you know what you are talking about, call them Hercs (short for their full name, the C130 Hercules). Use it in conversation today.

~Ashley

Major Weapons Systems Day!

Today was bring your wife to see the fancy airplanes day. Or not. On MWS day the pilots have a mandatory session where they hear from pilots of a variety of different planes the Air Force has. Afterword, you can go check out the planes, look in the cockpit, and ogle at those hunks of metal.

In case you actually would like to know the planes...here we go:

Top: Me in front of the C130. Right now Zach's plane of choice and a nice little cargo number.
Second: Zach with the C17, a cargo plane bigger than the C130. We got to see this one land. Big "oohs" and "ahhs" all around.
Middle: This is a PC12. No one knows what it does since it's top secret.
Fourth: The C17 landing...woot woot!
Bottom: The C17 again, plus some fighter planes in the foreground (but who cares about fighter planes...we don't!)

~Ashley

Family

It's been a while since last I posted here, and much has happened. In all honesty I don't know where to begin. Classes, sims, camping, jet skiing, date nights with the wife, studying. The list goes on and on. Every time I sit down to write about my time here, I have a difficulty in knowing where to start. See, so much happens each week that by the time I have sat down to type, I barely remember what has happened. So this week, rather than providing a play by play, I will share just a couple experiences, and some thoughts I am having. Unfortunately these experiences are not very uplifting.

The first experience was a conversation I had with a classmate of mine while riding stationary bikes at the gym. While we were riding she asked me if Ashley and I had ever lived together before we got married. Needless to say I said we had not, and began explaining why we had chosen not to. As we talked, I was struck by a couple of things. First, I could not believe how many different justifications she tried to give to living with someone you're not married to. The second thing that struck me was a comment she made at the end. She said that she wished she had the convictions that I had about what marriage is supposed to be. I tend to forget that not everyone has the beliefs that I and Ashley have. And it broke my heart. As she said those words, I could see in her eyes a longing for truth. I could tell she really did want those convictions, and to believe. She wanted to believe that two people could be married forever, that they could love each other and trust each other. And, yet, something else wouldn't let her accept it.

The second experience happened last night. Ashely is back in CA for a week and so I went to the officer's club with the fella's last night for a beer. As I stood there I looked around and noticed that there were two types of guys there. There were the single guys who were in flight school (and the married guys whose wives were out of town), and there were the older higher ups. I asked around as to how often they come and was shocked to hear that these guys were here every Friday night from 6-11 or 12, just drinking the night away. What really struck me was the knowledge that these men have wives, and kids. They have families. They work 12-14 hour days (sometimes more), 5 to 6 days a week. And here they are at the bar rather than at home with their families. This bothers me, a lot.

So what makes me write about these two particular instances you might ask? Well the answer is simple. Being married makes you think about this family stuff a lot more. I am so so grateful for the family life that I have had all my life, and the example my parents have been. They have given me a great base for what it means to be a spouse and a parent. They have helped set the foundation for my convictions and beliefs. Having a family in this world is going to be an interesting endeavor.

My new skill set

This post has almost nothing to do with pilot training.

Due to our remote location, the job hunt for me has not been very fruitful. Being so close to the border requires that I be bilingual for most town jobs and I have to compete with 200 other wives for all the jobs on base. Needless to say, I am branching out and trying out subbing while we are here. Today was my first day subbing for the public school system, and here are a few things I learned about first grade. Mind you, if I had a teaching certificate, I probably would have found this out sooner.

1. You should never let first graders sharpen their own pencils. Apparently this is a rule their teacher has but (to my chagrin) they remained quiet about. I discovered this when for about 20 minutes half the class was in line to sharpen their pencils. again. and again. If you are a first grade boy and feel like you have been working for more than 2 minutes, you should probably take a break and re-sharpen your pencil. And then you should get Miss Cushion to fix the sharpener because you broke it. Again.

2. Someone is always hitting someone else. Or kicking. Or poking. And then tattling.

3. You will spend the day walking around the room with no less than four children following you. I got a glimpse of what celebrities feel like with the paparazzi.

4. Potty breaks. "Didn't we just have a potty break 20 minutes ago?" Okay...fine.. "You have to go too?" " Wait a minute, the whole class can't go at the same time...hold on!"

It probably sounds like I didn't have a good time--Not true. I had a fabulous time. I'm just not used to being around so many children for an extended period of time and I've forgotten what it takes to keep them busy.

Please pray that I get some more sub opportunities on the horizon. That was my first, and last one scheduled for awhile unless something opens.

~Ashley

Airplanes and Paul the Apostle

Well it's three weeks down, and three to go until I start flying real aircraft. I am glad to put another week behind us, and excited to keep moving forward. This week was a week of technical information, and a challenge to my very much non-technical brain. On Tuesday morning we began our study of aerodynamics, and I felt a bit behind from the beginning. What happened to reading and writing? At times I think to myself that I should have been an engineer instead of a history major. Then I took a week of aero, and now I know for sure that I was never meant to be an engineer. That stuff is hard. We tested on Friday, and I passed, though not as well as I would have liked to. Grades have taken on a very different meaning, and though I only missed three questions, it was definitely a little prick in my pride (which is probably a good thing). 3 questions you say? Ya, I know, but those three questions could count for something down the road. See, the way academics are scored here is on a curve where at the end of the year, all our grades are added up, and the person with the highest score gets 100 points. The lowest person gets 0 points. Even if there is say a difference of 10 questions missed during the whole year, the bottom person still gets zero. Sucks. Also, we went to our senior classes graduation on Friday before the test, and they handed out the academic award to the highest scorer. The dude missed three questions the entire year. That's three out of around 700 questions. Unbelievable. But oh well, I'm over it now.

So aero was half of the week. The rest of the week consisted of classes on emergencies in the aircraft and a sim. This is where Paul comes in. You know how in Romans Paul says "The things I want to do I don't do, and the things I don't want to do I do (or something along those lines)." Well thats what flying is kind of like. Now, I admit that I have not flown an aircraft yet, but if the simulators are anything like the actual aircraft, it is very true. At this point, the plane does not do what I want it to do, and does what I don't want it to do. Turn left. What does it do? Descends. How about climb? It looses all it's airspeed. Go figure. Flying the sim was a blast this week, and makes me so excited to get in the actual aircraft in a few weeks. It also reminds me how much I do not know yet. Good thing I've still got a couple weeks to get at least a tad bit more confident.

As time goes on, I'm realizing more and more that I don't think man was ever meant to fly. I know there is the old adage that if man was meant to fly, God would have given him wings. Well...I'm beginning to think it is true. First it's our neanderthal bodies. Let's just say that God did not build our bodies in such a way as to promote flying. Secondly, there is our neanderthal brains. I don't care how good you think you are at multi-tasking, flying takes way more multi-tasking then we are meant to do. Third is the whole law of gravity thing. We have to overcome one of God's laws of physics every time we fly. And that's just the beginning. Oh ya, let's not forget that to fly we need a big ol metal contraption that is always trying to kill us. And, yet, people still fly everyday, and do it well. They learn to overcome their neanderthal brains and bodies, gravity, and learn to deal with that big ol metal contraption they've strapped themselves to. In a strange way, knowing all this just makes me want to do it more. It's a challenge to overcome, and it's exciting. I don't want to make it sound like flying is defying death...it's not nearly that bad. We have great planes, great mechanics, and great instructors. But I am saying that taking this challenge is something I feel very proud about. Not many people are up to this task. I just hope I am. I am excited to be here. I also think they should pay us more, but that's another story.

Well it's Saturday, which is wifeday, so I am off to go on a walk. Please continue to keep my wife and I in your prayers as we come closer to hitting the flightline. God bless.

Computer assisted instruction is a pain

Well it is now Saturday after my third week of UPT. Time here is flying so fast. It feels like yesterday that I began this whole adventure. We have now completed the first half of our aircraft systems lessons, and will be taking our final test on the subject on Monday. We will then be doing aerodynamics, flying fundamentals, contact (basic flying stuff), and 7ish simulators. All that is to say, I will by flying in 3ish weeks. CRAZY. As I'm sitting here thinking about what exactly I have to write, I'm realizing that this past week was actually kind of a bore. With the exception of doing our first simulator, which was actually pretty fun, I spent most of the week sitting in front of a computer having it teach me about the electrical system and the like. Not exactly thrilling, but I guess it will have to do for now. On that side of things, life will be much more exciting next week.

On a more personal side, this week presented some new challenges, namely getting used to the idea that I may not be the best here. I struggled with that a bit while I was at IFS as I sat there with a bunch of dudes who already had a bunch of flying experience, and am experiencing that once again. When I was younger and imagined being a pilot I never imagined I would be here with people who have more than a hundred hours of flight time, or already have experience flying aerobatics. I always kind of figured everyone would be there starting at zero, but that is simply not the case. And it's hard. At time's I wish I had studying engineering in school, or had been able to get my private pilot's license, or something along those lines, but when I really stop and think about it, I wouldn't change anything in my past. I loved studying history. I loved going to Biola (I did meet my wife there after all). It means that I am a little bit behind some of the other guys, but that is ok. I'm not about to quit. Rather, I am trying, and will continue to try, to use the resources I have in the guys in my class to become the best pilot I can.

3 weeks down...ish

Well we have now finished (almost) our third week of flight school. It has been busy. Three tests, our first physical fitness muscle endurance test, hours and hours of computer based training, and a few hours of boredom later, I am ready for another weekend. Where do I even begin. Last week was a blast (everyone says it is one of the better weeks of UPT). We spent the week in aerospace physiology. We studied survival, physiology, and life support. We practice parachute landing falls, dealing with hypoxia in an altitude chamber, strapping into the T6 aircraft and emergency egressing (exiting the aircraft in under 40 seconds), experienced spacial disorientation in the barany chair (a spin chair), and did drag training (practicing disconnecting from a parachute that is dragging you across the ground or water). It was very hands on, and a lot of fun. Plus, the tests were not too bad.

Over the weekend Ashley and I headed up to San Angelo to visit my good friend Stefan who is going to intel school up that way. It was nice to get out of Del Rio for a little bit, and got to experience some civilization for a night. It was an adventure. In addition to getting some awesome Japanese food, we went to a button festival, arts and crafts show, and a really dingy mexican restaurant. To back up a second, yes, we went to a button festival. See, Stefan found it online, and thought it would be kind of ridiculous, so naturally we wanted to go. It ended up being in a church lobby. We walked in the door and brought the average age down by about 20 years. Sitting all around the room were a bunch of older (65+) women showing off their button collections. Now I am all for collections (I still have my dinasaurs, and coins from my childhood), but really...buttons? One of the ladies saw us kind of snickering and took it upon herself to introduce us to the world of button collecting. We learned so very very much. We saw buttons made out of bone, buttons made out of wood, out of ivory, and all sorts of things. We saw buttons worth 10 cents, and buttons worth $2000 (who the frick pays that much money for a button?). We learned that there is an annual national button competition (we are going to go). All that is to say, it was a once in a lifetime experience.

We then went to an arts and crafts festival (I must remind you that Ashley was a part of this adventure and definitely had a role to play in where we went...but lets be honest, it was the guys who picked the button festival). With regard to the arts and crafts festival, the only real thing worth mentioning is that both Ashley and I won something from a raffle they held. First time I've ever won anything...ever. I was pretty darn excited!

Well thats it for now. I will post about this week soon.

Unbelievable

Well here is my first post during flight school. Can you believe that I am finally here. After all that has happened over the last year and a bit, it is unreal that I am finally here, starting flight school. As you heard from the wife, the first week was not exactly what I had expected. Rather than exciting and overwhelming, it was rather easy and slow. And, of course, rather frustrating as I was sick for the whole week. Though I am slowly recovering from my cold, it looks like I will have to deal with it for a few more days.

We have now completed all our classes on survival, and have our first test tomorrow. We have also begun classes in physiology, which is actually really interesting. We had an hour long course last week on the eyes, and I have been telling Ashley interesting facts ever since. This next week will be a long one, but a good one. In addition to our two tests, we will be doing our egress lab (meaning practicing getting out of the plane as quickly as possible), our O2 lab (not exactly sure what that is), the altitude chamber (where they give us hypoxia so that we can recognize the symptoms if it ever happens to us), taking our muscle endurance test, and sitting through hours of class. It's going to be a long week, but I think it will be a good one.

Of course, it is not all fun and games. I miss my wife already, and find it difficult to leave in the morning knowing that I won't see her again for 10 hours or so. I know that this is normal for a lot of people, but after having spent all day every day with my beautiful wife, it sucks having to be apart. And with my having been sick it was only worse. I see already that there will be many challenges to face in the coming months, but am encouraged by the knowledge that Ashley and I will be going through it together. Even with only one week done, I am sooo excited to go through this experience with her, and believe that it will challenge us as a couple, and help us grow in ways nothing else would. Ashley has already shown herself to be everything I could hope for, and has continued to be that pillar of encouragement when I am questioning the future, or when I'm sick, or stressed. God has blessed me sooo much, I can't even describe it.

Well that's it for now, back to studying. If you think of it, please be praying for us this week, and for health (Ashley came down with something today as well). We love you all.

Zach

And now a word from the Mrs...

Today marks the end of the first week of flight school. Zach had a great start with a fever, congestion, and the whole gamut of not-so-good symptoms, but it looks like he'll recover ;).
The student pilots hit the ground running, already having a test on Monday on survival, getting out of your plane in an emergency (turns out that's called egressing) and probably more that I don't even know. As a spouse, I also have the privilege of learning the material, too as Zach likes to process the information he studies out loud. ("Hey Ashley, do you know the four types of bone fractures? Let me tell you..."). I might be able to fly too at the end of this!

The spouses were treated to their very own orientation this week. We were briefed by our husbands' commanders, got to try out the very fun flight simulators (I didn't crash!), and climb up onto the plane. The fun was mixed with a lot of warning though. We were told that our husbands need to eat, breath, and sleep pilot training. We were asked by commanders to have patience when our husbands can't give us the attention we were used to getting. We were told that Saturdays were to be ours with our husband, but other than that they should be dedicating themselves to studying. I can see that with the highs and joys of passing tests, having his first solo ride, and eventually completing pilot training, there is also going to be a fair share of discouragement, frustration, and failure. For those of you who read this, please pray that Zach and I might keep our priorities straight, that we maintain patience and communication, and that above all, we would lean on the Lord who is our unchanging Rock.

Pictures: (Top) My first time giving Zach a haircut. It only took 1 hour and 1 snip of the ear. (Middle) Zach's first day of flight school! (Bottom) Zach got his helmet, and it turns out to be a good protector when you're chopping onions.

And we're back...and married...and two weeks before starting flight school

Ok...so to all you who actually read this blog (Dad), I am back. It's been a wild ride since last I posted, and life is about to get really crazy again. Hopefully I will remain faithful in my blog posting from here on out. I mean, lets be honest, the whole point of starting this blog in the first place was to speak of my adventures, and share what I am learning. Well, if my life is not an adventure now, it never will be.

To summarize the last two months...the wedding was awesome. Perfect actually. The honeymoon was awesome also. Coming from 105 degree del rio and spending a week on the central coast of CA is a truly great experience, especially with your wife. I mean, heck yes. Our drive out to TX was rather uneventful...just the way we like it. We did stay at a pretty great resort in Tucson (if you drive through, check out the Lodge at Ventana Canyon). The best place we stayed of course was in Ft. Davis, TX. After driving through what ended up being 90 miles of absolutely nothing, we got to Ft. Davis, a town strait out of a John Wayne movie. On the border of Big Bend National Park, the town has like 100 people in it. We stayed in this hotel that was built in 1909, and though it was admittedly a little bit creepy, it was well worth the trip. Plus, it is the most beautiful part of TX (at least of what I have seen so far).

Since arriving in Del Rio, life has been a whirlwind of activity. Ashley and I have moved into a cute little three bedroom duplex (three little bedrooms) on base which probably hasn't really been renovated since it was built in the 50s. We've been working like crazy to make it feel like home, and I think we've done an excellent job. Ashley has jumped right into this little world, joined a woman's bible study at our church, and has volunteered to do Awana there as well. The job search is ongoing, but Del Rio is a hard place for anyone finding a job. There looks to be some hope in the school district, specifically for Ashley to substitute teach. If you think about it, you can definitely be praying. Having a job will be particularly important once I start flight school, so that Ashley will not have to sit at home all day by herself.

Speaking of flight school...I start in less than two weeks. It is really hard to believe. I got my G-suit fitted, and my mask and helmet fitted on Monday, and will be meeting most of my class tomorrow. Then, on the Tuesday after Labor day, it all starts. I am both super excited, and absolutely terrified. It's a good feeling.

Well I think that's about it for now. If anything happens between now and two weeks from now I will let you all know, if not, I will post next once UPT starts.

20 days...holy moley

That's right, I will be getting married 20 days from today. The last few days out here in TX have been absolutely fantastic. After not having seen Ashley in almost seven weeks, I am finally able to see her beautiful face in person again. Coming in Friday night, it was great to be able to spend Independence day with her, go to church, and get a bit of an idea what our lives are going to look like in a couple weeks. It's strange to think that in less than three weeks my life will be completely different...again. There has been so much transition over the past seven months, and now I'm finally getting to the transition I am actually looking forward to. Ya, there will be challenges, especially for Ashley as she goes through the challenges not only of transitioning into a new marriage, but also moving her entire life to Del Rio. Not exactly paradise, but it will be good for a little while. Over the past may months, the wedding has always felt so far away. It was 5 months...and that felt like forever. Then it was 10 weeks...still forever. Then all of a sudden it was a month, then three weeks. Now, all of a sudden, it feels just around the corner. We bought couches, and we are hopefully reserving our on-base home here today or tomorrow. It's all moving so fast, yet it's not happening fast enough. Those months before leaving for Alabama went so incredibly slow. It was January and February for a life time; March, April, May and June were but a blink in time. Weird.

Home sweet home....who would'ne thought?

Well, I made it. On Monday I had my checkride at IFS, and somehow, by the grace of God, passed. I cannot even begin to tell you all the relief when at the end of the ride my IP (instructor pilot) asked if I had any more questions. I asked if his comments meant I could go home yet...he said yes. In that moment it was as if a giant weight was lfted from my shoulders. It was awesome. I'm still not sure how I passed, or how I made it through the course, but by the amazing grace of God I did just that. I am not back at Laughlin an jumping head first back into life here. Hope all is well.

Another week done...heading home soon

Well, another week here in Pueblo is finished, thank God. This last week was a complex one to be sure. It was full of highs and lows. The highs were, well pretty freakin amazing. The lows, well they were pretty freakin sucky. This week was also full of firsts. I flew by myself for the first time. Whenever I say or write those words, it seems so surreal. Three weeks ago I had never been inside a small aircraft. On Thursday I flew one all by myself. Strang. This week was also a first in that I failed at something. Though of course I have failed at many things over the years, I have not failed in something of much significance in a decade. Over the last few years, whenever I have set my mind to something, I have been able to attain it. Whether that was in academics, ROTC, fitness, or anything else, I did not fail. Well on Thursday, following my awesome solo flight, I failed my second ride of the day. And it sucked. On Thursday afternoon, I was supposed to have my second to last flight, followed by my last one on Friday. Well that didn't happen.

During that flight, everything that could go wrong seemed to. Despite my ability to land 11 times earlier that morning, no matter how hard I tried that afternoon, I could not get the plane on the ground. With 13kt cross winds, all my efforts were to no avail. Then, when I got out to my practice area (where we do manuevers), I could not do them to save my life. Before we even got out of the plane back at Pueblo, my instructor told me I would be repeating that flight. It was a punch in the gut. I had tried so hard, and I had done my very best with every "landing" and every manuever, yet it didn't matter. My very best effort still resulted in a failure. For someone who is not used to such things, it is a very difficult pill to swallow. But, at the same time, it was a good. I suppose it is good to fail every once in a while. It is good to have something kick our butts, and it is good to be reminded that our best simply is not good enough. Only is our best through God good enough. That is an important lesson to learn. This was a good time to learn it.

On a happier note, I did redo the flight on Friday, and though I did not feel it to be my strongest flight since being here, my instructor (a different guy) gave me the best grades I've received thus far, and said I was ready for my check ride on Monday. So, God willing, I will be completing my final ride here in Pueblo on Monday, and pass or fail, I will be leaving here by Wed (weather permitting).

As I head into this final flight, your continued prayers would be much much appreciated.

A Day on the Mountain

Frustrations and Prayers

This will be my last post of the weekend, unfortunately. I say unfortunately because it means that in a two hours I need to be in bed so that I can wake up at 3:00am to get ready for my formal briefing at 0420 and my flight briefing at 0510am. That will pretty much be this week. Should be fun, no? I title this entry "frustrations and prayers," because in many ways that is what life right now is like.

The frustrations come out in a number of ways. Frustrations at not being able to do a good landing yet. Frustrations at being 3-5 flights behind most of my friends because I keep getting weathered out of flights. Frustrations that it looks like I will not get out of here for more than a week, when most of my friends will be leaving sometime this week. Frustrations at trying to give my all, but constantly feeling like I just can't hack it. Those kind of frustrations.

Prayers are the result of these frustrations. Or, at least, I am trying to make them the results. A friend back at Laughlin put it best. Before I came, he said this place will do one of two things to you. It will drive you to God, or it will drive you to beer. For most here, booze is the direction they go. For me, I refuse to go down that road. Thus, the option left to me is God, and I am glad for it. I would be lying if I said that every moment of the day I am laying all this at his feet. But I sure as hell am trying too. I don't like carrying this, and I don't like being constantly frustrated or upset. It just doesn't work for me. All of your prayers mean the world to me, and if it were not for them, I have no doubt I would have given up before now. It seems to me that it is all of you who have prayed me through the last six months. Through the difficulty of moving to TX, and through all the challenges that came from that. And now, it is you once again who are praying me through here. I don't know what will happen here in the coming week, but I do know that whatever it is, it will not be a result of a lack of petition on my behalf. It will be the will of the Lord. I am overwhelmed by the love and support of all of you, and am so incredibly greatful.

As I head into week number 3 of flying, your continued prayer and petition, grace and love, are appreciated more than I could ever express. I love you all.

Week two...and a little bit

Well there she is, another week down. One or two to go, depending on weather, passing my flights, and all sorts of other stuff. It is hard to believe that I have only been here for a little over two weeks. In all honesty, it feels as though I have been here a lifetime. Days here go by slower than I could have ever imagined. I miss being able to talk to my love every day for an hour, and my parents, sisters, and friends regularly. I miss being able to relax when I come home, and being able to enjoy my evenings. Yet, I am glad to be having this experience.

It is hard to explain the things that are going on in my head and heart, and every time I attempt to put them into words, I find myself rather befuddled. How does one explain what it's like to feel discouraged every day? How does one put into words the million feelings that rush through one's mind and body as you attempt to try something you have never done before, all the while being overwhelmed by a feeling of impossibility. Fear of failure. Fear of inability. Fear of the future. Pride. Refusal to admit difficulty. Discouragement at not being able to do something even when you are doing everything within your power to be able to do it.

As many of you know, I have often found myself at the top of my class, and have rarely found things that I have been unable to do well. When I have found those things, I have generally quickly turned the other direction and left them in the rear-view mirror (ie: playing an instrument). But now, I am stuck here, doing something where not only am I not the top of my class, but rather I am struggling to stay here at all. And, quite frankly, I don't like it...not one bit. But, in all honesty, it's probably exactly what I need. I could not agree more with my big sis Amy. Sometimes we need to fail. Some times we need to struggle. Sometimes we need to be able to admit we can't do something, or be able to acknowledge that our best is barely enough to get by, or not enough to get by at all. There is indeed something to be said about bringing one's fears and failures to the Lord.

I said above that despite these trials, I am glad for this experience. Even writing those words seems kind of crazy to me. But it's true. I am glad because of the opportunities it gives me. It gives me the opportunity to once again place my fears, discouragement, and apprehensions at the feet of God. Actually, it's more like throw them at his feet, because if I don't I'll end up holding onto them. It gives me the opportunity to to rely on the support and encouragement of my friends and family. It gives me the opportunity to build perseverance muscle and do keep on pushing through even when I don't want to. This is difficult muscle to build, and it is only built through experience. It gives me an opportunity to break down my pride, and an opportunity for me to admit my struggles and challenges to those around me. It gives me an opportunity to fight for joy, and for peace, and for grace (from God, from those who surround me now, and from myself). These are all opportunities that do not arise during regular, everyday work. May God give me the strength to take advantage of these opportunities.

Flight numero 3

Well there you have it. Flight numero 3 down...11 to go. First of all, I wanted you all to know that I really appreciate your love and support, and constant prayer. I do not know how this whole thing will end, but I do know that it is your prayer and support that is helping me be willing to get out of bed each of these mornings, and run head-first at the challenges I face. I flew again this afternoon, and to say that it was a rough flight would be an understatement. With challenging winds gusting up to 22knots (that's quite a bit), I felt as though I was fighting the wind god for over an hour. That, my friends, is tiring indeed. After many failed attempts at landings (which sounds kind of funny if you really think about it), and a bit of air sickness, I did manage to make it back to Pueblo, get my plane where it needed to be, and even get some dinner. Now as I head to go chair fly (that is sitting in a chair and pretending you are flying) I can only say that this is an unparalleled experience. When I went through field training (boot camp) a few years ago, I expressed how I felt as though it was the hardest thing I had done (and it probably was). I am still grateful for that experience, and the once in a life time lessons I was able to learn. I expect that this will be a similar experience. As I head into day two of week three, I say lets go. Whatever happens happens. God is in control. All I can do is give it my best tomorrow...and see what happens.

Week two: uh oh

Well, I have now completed two flights here at IFS...and it is hard. The movies make flying look so easy, but it isn't. There are a million things going on all at once. You checking airspeed, altitude, listening to the radio, looking at your GPS, trying to follow ground tracks, and that is just for straight and level flight. To say that these two weeks have been difficult is just scratching the surface. It has been far more than hard. In fact, it made me want to quite. As you probably know, I am not a quitter. I never have been. But after two flights, that's exactly what I wanted to do. Thankfully, my fiance and then my dad gave me the wise advice they always do, why not stick it out. If you decide you don't want to fly, then you can decide it after you have completed this program. Why shut this door now when you don't have to. Maybe it will be shut for you if you end up washing out, or maybe it won't. Either way, what do you have to lose by plugging away for two more weeks. The answer, needless to say, is nothing. I'm afraid of failing. It has always been that way, and if I am honest with myself and with others, I should admit that I am really afraid of failing here. Yet, at the same time, over the past day, God has given me a real peace. The best way to describe this place is "whatever happens happens." There are no guarentees here. There is no way to know that you will pass. I have lost two friends to washing out this last week. Both of them intelligent dudes. There are no guarentees. But hey, maybe that's the way it should be.

WOw

Ok, so it is Sunday afternoon (just barely) and I have been studying already for 4.5 hours. Today has actually been incredibly productive as I have not only studied test material, but also the local flying procedures, radio calls, call outs, and checklists. I spent about 2 hours this morning sitting in a mock cockpit running over checklists again and again and again. Oh, I'm going to get it. Can't wait. The more time I spend studying, the more I amazed I am at how much we can learn when we really put our minds to it. Anyways, enough for now. Back to studying.

Drinking from the fire hose

Alright ya'll, here is my first post from beautiful Pueblo, CO. I arrived here on Tuesday evening, and have been going about a million miles an hour ever since. It is crazy to think about the last 48 hours. 22 hours of class, 8 hours of studying, and 2 hours of pt. Add in 50 min for each meal, and well, that's a wrap. Though I am definitely overwhelmed by the incredible amount of information that I have been given over the last two days, when I stop and think about how much I've learned, it's really incredible. I've learned about aerodynamics, aircraft performances, the DA-20 systems, radio traffic, airport operations, landing, taking off, flying patters, turns, checklists, weather, and all sorts of other stuff. Now, I am by no means an expert here, or will I be even by the time I'm done, but I sure as heck am trying. It's challenging, and it is hard when you're thrown into a position where you don't know virtually anything, but then again, I suppose that's where we grow. Well, I think that's it for now. It's time to go make some flashcards. Peace.

The Blue Kazak--Doing its business

Carlsbad Caves